Anyhow, here goes.
May has been a good month, mostly. I think the "peace of God" has been a common theme in this category. It has been so cool to see how the Lord has been working in my life in this area. I went on a mini vacation to Illinois to see my boyfriend it was so refreshing to get away from Wisconsin and life here for a little bit. It was such a wonderful time for me.
I have still been dealing with some medical stuff and I actually finally had an appointment with a specialist this week. And I had an emergency dental procedure this week as well. It's been pretty crazy. In spite of everything going on I haven't gotten too overwhelmed with the problems or the incoming bills. I just know that God will see me through this all and He will provide for my needs. I guess my positive thinking is totally based on my reliance on the Lord.
Again, no. I think my monthly goal for June is going to be exercise related just because it is something I need to get more motivated to do. I am still losing/not gaining back weight from being sick, so it isn't about weight loss as much as it is about being healthy and active for me.
Well, because of my health issues my appetite still hasn't been amazing. I basically eat about one "real" meal a day and then snack on what looks good when the mood strikes me.. I don't do that because I am trying to diet or whatever, I'm not. I just am not hungry enough to eat a well rounded diet. It's been really hard and really frustrating at times. I have a surgical test next month and hopefully I will be able to get some answers and advice after that as to how to get better.
May has definitely been a month for working hard. I worked a lot of hours this month so it's been kinda crazy. It was nice to have that balance of working hard and taking a break with going down to Illinois. So while I did work a lot, I don't exactly feel like that is all I did...which is very refreshing. There isn't much worse than coming to the end of a month and thinking that you didn't do anything besides work!
I think a lot of my strength this month came from learning how to find joy inside of the hard or the not ideal. My pastor once said that "Happiness depends on happenings...joy depends on Jesus." That truth is really coming to light in my life. I do have a lot in my life to be happy about. But because of Jesus I have a lot MORE to be joyful about. That joy is more important than happy, pain or worry. I have been clinging to that joy a lot, especially on the hard days.
Despite the troubles I had this month, I didn't find myself worrying all that much. I guess part of it is that I was so busy I didn't have time. I have been trying really hard to fill my time with worthwhile things so I don't have a lot of "down time" to think and dwell and all that jazz. It has been really helping me to fill my time. It has also been amazing to know that I have the prayer and support of the people in my life as well.
I think that One Direction's "What Makes You Beautiful" was my favorite song to turn up loud and car dance to this month. Half the month I had no idea who sang it...it was kinda funny because some friends on facebook were all like "Omygosh, I LOVE New Direction" and people were talking about the band on Twitter...I was like
And then one day I heard that this song was One Direction and I was all like, "Oh, I understand now."
The song is just peppy, fun and totally good to turn up loud and sing along to. :)
There is a lot I could share here, but I don't really want to say too much because I like keeping the private private. I will say that I am learning a lot about love in ways that are new and exciting to me. I cannot find find the words to express what it is like to have someone care about me and to have the joy of caring in return. I am so happy. But the important thing is the joy that we share in the Lord, He is the basis of our relationship and I treasure that more than anything else.
I was a pretty happy girl this month! My trip to Illinois was wonderful and I have a lot in my life to be happy about. But the thing I am learning that having the joy of the Lord in my heart and flowing through my life is what matters. That joy supersedes anything bad that can come in my life and brings me such great peace. I am trying to to get better at holding onto the peace and joy and not let the happenings of my life take my eyes off the Lord. He is more important than anything in my life and I need to keep my focus on Him.
I think my goal for this month is to try to make an effort to be more active outside of my physically demanding job. Whether this is by going to the gym, riding my bike or taking a walk it is my goal to do something once a week. I know that doesn't seem like a lot, but it is more than I am doing now so it will be improvement. I also don't want to over-commit because of how weird my health has been. So it is an "easy" goal, but it is a goal nonetheless. :)